The Festivus Society of Greater Newburyport, or FSGN, is a group of individuals, both local and long-distance, who celebrate or are interested in celebrating the traditional holiday of Festivus.  The FSGN plans local Festivus celebrations and networks with others who celebrate this great festivity – in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, the nation, and the world at large.

            Festivus is a holiday which falls on the twenty-third day of December.  It has its origin in the popular TV sitcom, “Seinfeld.”  The following is cited from an amateur Festivus page (which in turn takes its information directly from the official site):

Many a Christmas ago, Frank Costanza went to buy a doll for his son.  He went to reach for it (because it was the last one), but so did another man – and as Frank rained blows upon the poor fellow, he thought that there must be another way.  The doll was destroyed, but out of that, a new holiday was born.  It was called Festivus.

“A FESTIVUS FOR THE REST-OF-US”
December 23^rd

During the last few weeks in December (when Festivus takes place), families and friends get together at the dinner table and engage in what is called the “Airing of Grievances.”  During this time, we share with our friends and family members all of the ways they disappointed us over the past year.

After the Airing of Grievances, we get together for the "Feats of Strength.”  This is where the head of the household tests his strength with another friend or family member. The great honor is given out to a different person each year. This year, Cosmo Kramer was given the honor, but turned it down, calling upon George Costanza to fill in for him as he had an appointment.

Festivus celebrations require a hollow, metal pole in place of a tree.

Frank Costanza believed that tinsel was very distracting, thus there are no decorations.

Traditionally, Festivus Poles are tall, silver, hollow, long, skinny, and heavy.

In honor of this holiday, Kramerica Industries made a donation to the Human Fund under the names of all their employees.

To obtain a Human Fund donation card, please visit this off-site link:

·        Festivus Pole in Lieu of a Tree

o       We recommend you use a metal pole or rod, or, if necessary, a plastic PVC pipe will do.  Miniature Festivus Poles are one to three feet long.  Short poles may be as long as three to four feet (some fun ideas with portable Festivus Poles: place in the middle of the dinner table, on a desk, under or over custom decorations and tapestries, etc.  One may also use portable poles in marches and processions, or as an impromptu baton of sorts).  The medium-sized Festivus Pole measures six to eight feet in height.  This is the preferred size for Traditional Festivus celebrations as well as episode re-enactments.  Poles measuring nine feet or higher are definitely considered to be large Festivus Poles, and are extremely ritzy and extravagant, to be used for large get-togethers.  As aforementioned, Festivus Poles are traditionally hollow, long, thin, heavy, tall, and silver in color.  Iron is the standard substance for these poles, but silver may also be used (in the absence of iron, steel may be used, then aluminum, then tin, then lead, then any other metal – and  then, finally, if absolutely necessary, plastic PVC pipe, wood painted or gilded in silver plating or gray paint, or, in the absence of wood, some other worthy material might also be used).  As far as the orientation of your pole is concerned, you might tighten a traditional Christmas tree stand around it, placing it either in the center or the corner of the room.  You may also stick it in a hole, attempt to somehow balance it, or suspend it from the ceiling on a string or rope.  Tripods, weights, or clothing stands may also be used.  In non-traditional or custom celebrations, decorations of your choice may be used.  In more traditional context, decorations are to be kept at a minimum.  However, tinsel is universally and absolutely forbidden.  Christmas lights and exuberant decorations are to be frowned at, but then again, it’s your Festivus!

·        Airing of Grievances

o       You might choose to engage in a traditional rant this Festivus, or you might like to try being creative, doing things such as complaints or other rhetoric and amusement.  Traditionally, one reminds the participants all the ways in which they disappointed him since last Festivus (or, if you like, more than a year ago).

·        Festivus Meal